I Meditates /tesserae

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read HERE

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1

there is clean air and green

undergrowth

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the sound of birds here and

there

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a fly buzzing by a couple of

cars in the

distance a tractor roaring

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the sun dancing in blobby

patches on my upper body

light breeze whispering

through leaves in the trees

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the shadow of leaves

on my yellow T minuscule

green bugs

on my arms bugs a-whirl

under the leafage

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a dog’s barking insects in

the grass

pigeon cooing

a plane droning overhead

in the sky—

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the texture feels balming

and silky—

like silk shirt rippling on

the fine dough of my body

in the early summer oven

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oh yeah!

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2

I am the son of the sun.

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3

when you sit down to meditate: ask yourself directly what you are expecting from doing it. where do you expect to arrive at. what psychological state are you in fact chasing. what are you actually after?

for me: it is basically a sense of feeling OK. a sense of being right there where I belong. a sense of being grounded in the given moment and place. among the people who matter to me and the people to whom I matter. where I feel satisfied with where and what and how I am. where everything’s in its place. where I feel integral to a whole.

or basically a sense of having a clear conscience. a sense of being responsible for myself and for my life. that I am not a burden on anyone. that I am not an imposition. on the contrary: that my presence adds something of value to the people and the world around me. that I am conducive to the well-being of the world around me. that my contribution matters. that my talents are relevant.

yes.

I expect to be relieved of the pressure of feeling guilty for who I am. I expect to be guilt- and shame-free. I expect to feel that my existence is of use and of value and that I am a PLUS rather than a MINUS (i.e. a useless hunk of mushy flesh—a waste of precious resources).

that’s basically what I expect to feel.

and then: I allow myself the feeling.

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4

nowadays the attitude of enjoying quietude is a rather neglected aptitude.

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5

each moment you can choose between opening up—or contracting around a trickle and shallow treat of yet another distraction.

the more you choose the latter: the less you’ll feel alive and well.

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6

the heavy flapping of pigeon wings wrinkles up the smooth fabric of quietude.

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7

the whimper of a lawn mower

a mile away

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a car’s door slamming shut

the engine revving up

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a neighbor sweeping their

backyard

a couple houses down the

street

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a black ant reconnoitering

on my left knee

green apple snug on

the wet sand in front of me

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a cockchafer riding the air

like chopper

the train at the edge of the

town passing by

in the direction of the capital

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8

when a sliver of a childhood feeling pierces me. the richness of it overwhelms me. to such an extent that it feels too much to take. without breaking down into sobbing. how simple it was. and how free of the mind. of the demands of the ego.

it was so pure and so simple.

so natural.

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9

the clouds morph into sky. the apple rots on the ground. there is coming and going. and a restless madness in between.

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10

what a cruel joke is this. we learn how to properly live only in retrospect. we realize what matters only after it’s gone. we find true joy in the finality of our sadness.

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11

being honest with yourself is difficult: precisely to the extent that you refrain from being bored—sitting in silence meditating on stuff by putting questions to yourself and inquiring—on a regular basis.

because the less you work out your honesty-muscle the more atrophied it gets.

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12

the sun’s sons we are.

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13

there’s church bell tolling and a

pig groaning

in a sty nearby (must be big from

the sound of it)

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and the sound of the pen on the

paper I am holding

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mosquito fixing to start drilling

near my ankle on my left leg

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there is constant stirring.

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stillness indeed is a shifty business.

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COVID tesserae

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1

some call it Corona. some say COVID-19. some use the formula SARS-CoV-2.

I personally prefer COVID 84. but COVID 22 sounds quite apt as well—IMO.

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2

the irony of being censored for sharing stuff that is supposedly harmful for impressionable minds—when all the censors are doing is propagating content that is appealing to the reactive part of our mind.

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3

THE TECH PLATFORMS HAVE LITTLE FINANCIAL MOTIVE FOR PRIORITIZING TRUTH OVER ENGAGEMENT.

David Fuller

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4

yet another exercise in distracting from the real pandemic unfolding: that of a technocracy with its so-called smart gadgets—which indeed are instrumental in the ‘social distancing’ trending since a couple of decades already.

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5

here’s one rule of thumb: the more blatantly they talk to you as if to a naïve child—admonishing from an opinionated and pontificating standpoint—the less you are to trust what they are saying.

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6

YOU ATTRACT WHAT YOU PUT UP WITH.

Adyashanti

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7

if you’re beaver enough to demand that we all wear a face mask then do not half-ass it when you are wearing it. you ain’t Pinocchio with too big of a nose to properly sport it. just wear it the way it is intended to be worn—dummy. exercise your cluelessness. advertise your hypocrisy.

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8

IF WE LED OUR LIVES ACCORDING TO THE WAYS INTENDED BY NATURE AND THE LESSONS TAUGHT BY HER, WE SHOULD BE INTUITIVELY OBEDIENT TO OUR PARENTS; LATER WE SHOULD ADOPT REASON AS OUR GUIDE AND BECOME SLAVES TO NOBODY.

Étienne de La Boétie

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9

the sheepish feel so embarrassed in the face of the skeptics that they feel compelled to find a way to shame them.

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10

as the war on communism demanded of the citizens to enlist in the service of democracy—as their patriotic duty—so does the War on COVID (WC) demand of the citizens that they get vaccinated?

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11

JUST EXPOSE AND ELIMINATE THOSE BAD GUYS. THAT IS THE PREVAILING HOLLYWOOD FORMULA FOR RIGHTING THE WORLD’S WRONGS: A HEROIC CHAMPION CONFRONTS AND DEFEATS THE BAD GUY, AND EVERYONE LIVES HAPPILY EVER AFTER. WHICH IS THE SAME BASIC FORMULA, INCIDENTALLY, AS BLAMING ILL HEALTH ON GERMS AND KILLING THEM WITH THE ARSENAL OF MEDICINE, SO THAT WE CAN LIVE SAFE HEALTHY LIVES EVER AFTER, OR KILLING THE TERRORISTS AND WALLING OUT THE IMMIGRANTS AND LOCKING UP THE CRIMINALS, ALL AGAIN SO THAT WE CAN LIVE SAFE HEALTHY LIVES EVER AFTER.

Charles Eisenstein

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12

it doesn’t matter how blatant a lie is when enough people are psychologically invested in it.

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13

the real problem is not the fact that the deadly pandemic story (or is it a paradigm?) is most dubious—but that for most people it is important that it be real (whether it is indeed true or not).

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because it gives us an excuse to have a break from our 9 to 5 nightmare of decent and respectable (i.e. spiritually abject and wretched) citizenship.

and we get a free pass to regress to an infantile state—that in all likelihood we have yet to develop and evolve beyond anyway.

as we get to be comfortably numb and irresponsible (vulnerable little infants in need of paternal protection) while performing the act of being responsible: by socially distancing and muzzling ourselves and as good as bleaching our hands with disinfectants like OCD maniacs.

in other words: the real problem is that many of us are actually invested in the narrative being true.

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14

THE DOCTORS ARE COMPROMISED. THE PROFESSORS ARE COMPROMISED. THE JOURNALISTS ARE COMPROMISED. THE POLITICIANS ARE COMPROMISED. ABOUT THE ONLY THING THAT ISN’T BADLY COMPROMISED ARE PEOPLE WITH AN INDEPENDENT SOURCE OF SUSTENANCE—INDIVIDUALS AND VERY SMALL GROUPS ARE ABOUT THE ONLY THING THAT IS FREE OF THIS DISEASE OF THE EMBEDDED GROWTH OBLIGATION.

Eric Weinstein

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15

STAY ALERT

otherwise what? what happens otherwise? I fail to detect the little beastie? sneaking up on me sorry ass? or I cease perchance to worry? and unwittingly give my immune.sys a break and a chance to properly replenish itself?

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CONTROL THE VIRUS

that invisible insidious menace. the boogey bug. the horde at the gates. and the best way to face the little bugger’s to hide from it and weaken myself further by over-sterilizing my environment and further degrading my immune system. sounds pretty sound a strategy indeed.

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SAVE LIVES

whose life? mine? (if mine: relax! and don’t bother mate! I am actually okay with you BEING FREE.) or is it gramp’s or grannie’s life? (apart from meeting the kids and the grandkids they don’t have much life anyway.) what lives are we supposed to save again? (in what twisted world is disengagement the way to healing?)

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how about ‘’KEEP COOL BUT CARE’’ instead.

or: ‘’KEEP IT BOUNCING.’’

doesn’t it make more sense to heed slogans like these?

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17

IT’S EXTREMELY IMPORTANT, HERE AND NOW, TO START THINKING ABOUT THESE PROBLEMS — NOT TO LET OURSELVES BE TAKEN BY SURPRISE BY THE NEW ADVANCES OF TECHNOLOGY.[…] WE CAN FORESEE, AND WE CAN DO A GREAT DEAL TO FORESTALL. AFTER ALL, THE PRICE OF FREEDOM IS ETERNAL VIGILANCE.

Aldous Huxley

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18

fkn shop assistant sent me out of the supermarket with a half-full shopping cart because I was wearing a scarf instead of a mask. he ordered me to leave at once.

I asked him if the scarf was not okay and how come and then if he could sell me a mask. he answered me by insisting that I left the premises. immediately and at once. pushing as he spoke with a rabid dour scowl the cart away from me.

and I smiled it off and told the guy to cool it and just keep it cool. and slowly I wended my way toward the exit.

bitch was baiting a scene from the get though. approached with a vengeance already angry.

I knew the guy was only following orders (and enjoying it). which was pathetic at best. but his autocue antagonism still hurt me somewhat.

what a pointless interaction. what a waste of emotional energy. but at least it got me thinking.

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19

MUST THE CITIZEN EVER FOR A MOMENT, OR IN THE LEAST DEGREE, RESIGN HIS CONSCIENCE TO THE LEGISLATION? WHY HAS EVERY MAN A CONSCIENCE, THEN? I THINK THAT WE SHOULD BE MEN FIRST, AND SUBJECTS AFTERWARD. IT IS NOT DESIRABLE TO CULTIVATE A RESPECT FOR THE LAW, SO MUCH AS FOR THE RIGHT. THE ONLY OBLIGATION WHICH I HAVE A RIGHT TO ASSUME IS TO DO AT ANY TIME WHAT I THINK RIGHT.

Henry David Thoreau

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20

to wear it or not to wear it. that is the question. to obey authority or to defy authoritarianism.

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this mask phenomenon’s indeed way beyond a health and safety issue or an ethical question. it’s more like an existential dilemma in fact.

do you continue to place your trust in the leaders or do you start deferring at last to your deeper instincts and intuitions?

the answer is not that simple.

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on the one hand it does seem advisable to wear it—even if only as a ‘gesture’ toward society. on the other though—when that society is trending toward a decentralized form of despotism and a subliminal type tyranny—it is as good as imperative that you refuse to wear it—as an assertion of spiritual integrity and self-reliance.

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but then: who the hell can afford that?

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21

IT’S NOT A HEALTH CRISIS. IT’S A MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS.

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